Saturday, 31 December 2011

My 2011 Review

WOW, what a year? George Osbourne, The Chancellor of the Exchequer, warned it’ll be a bad one and he wasn’t half wrong.

On a personal level, my business went from good to bad to gone. My sister burnt her house down. My nieces found sex drugs and rock’n’roll and my aunt and uncle passed away with-in months of each other.

I celebrated my fortieth birthday, broke my camcorder, posted my 100th YouTube home movie and discovered Sky channel 201.

The good news was that we enjoyed our first family holiday's to Greece, Camber Sands and Butlins in Bognor Regis.

I lost a stone in weight and am on course to losing a lot more, my health check says I’m healthy and we’ve got enough money in the bank to last us another few months without working.

I’m writing a book and with superb kids in my arms and a wonderful girlfriend willing to be my wife, I’m a very lucky man indeed.


Bring on 2012 and let’s see what you bring. A book deal, followed by a movie deal please.


MY HIGHLIGHT OF THE YEAR IS:

The assassination of Bin Ladan, wot a joke!!!

Donald Trump jumps on the conspiracy bandwagon and asks to see Obama's birth certificate. Millions have been asking to see it since he became President but the Whitehouse have always rised above it, but as soon as an American billionaire wants to see it, they publish it in a rush. Such a rush it turns out that they never even flattened the photoshop file. Within minutes of it being posted on the Whitehouse website, the layers are dissected and it's proved to be faked. All hell breaks loose and 24 hours later Obama declares to the world the number-one boogyman, has been killed.

Within minutes of the death shot being posted, it's proved to be a fake, and within hours the body is dumped at sea, conveniently hiding the evidence the world wants to see.

Weeks later the soldiers alledged to have taken part in his assassination were also silenced forever by being shot down and killed in their helicopter.

And to think the world brought this shit...


Have a Happy New Year and a Prosperous 2012, open your eyes and ears to the lies we're being fed, please.....

Friday, 23 December 2011

My 2011 Book Review

It’s gotta be my worst ever year for reading books.

I still haven’t finished reading them, the same goes for Stephen King’s The Dome, Andrew Smith’s Moon Dust and David Icke’s The Biggest Secret.

More shocking is that I haven’t read a Peter James novel this year, and it’s not because he never invited me to any of his book launches like he promised too, it’s just that I’ve got enough to get through without adding more to the pile.

Here are the six books I did manage to read, cover to cover.

The Kingdom of the Blind by David Bishop (A Judge Dredd Novel)

11 February 2011, at home in Brighton, Paper-back, 274 pages, 10/10 rating

I just love everything to do with Judge Dredd. I read this as a follow on from reading the un-official movie script from the internet.


The Truth Agenda by Andy Thomas

17 August 2011, at home in Brighton, Paper-back, 386 pages, 9/10 rating

The best book on conspiracy theories I’ve ever read, and the only one come to think of it. I’m more of a believer than I ever have been. The book is well written, well researched and well balanced. I’d recommend it to anyone.

Totally Killer by Greg Olear

20 September 2011, on holiday in Greece, Paper-back, 274 pages, 7/10 rating

It wasn’t a worthless read, but it was close! In its defence, the memory of the story lingered in my mind for a few days which is always a good sign of a good read.


Whiteout by James Swallow (A Judge Dredd Novel)

27 September 2011, on holiday in Greece, Paper-back, 250 pages, 9/10 rating

It’s amazing how the author is able to engross me into the weird and wonderful world of Mega City One and actually make me care about the craziest which goes on in there.

I give this a whooping 9/10 and as always look forward to entering the amazing world of Judge Dredd and MG1 again very soon.

The Enemy by Lee Child

11 October 2011, at home in Brighton, Hard-back, 412 pages, 8/10 rating

The 1st Jack Reacher novel I’ve read and I’m still recovering from the shock that Reacher turns out to be a cold bloodied killer.


Tripwire by Lee Child

18 December 2011, at home in Brighton, Paper-back, 541 pages, 8/10 rating

The second Lee Child book and I enjoyed it as much as the first. Lee Child has inspired me to write my own book by not worrying how you write it, but just to write it in your own words and your own style. I’ve already got the next Reacher book on my book shelve with-in reach, ready to read.

Sunday, 11 December 2011

A CHRISTMAS TALE

Hey kids, I’ve got some good news and I’ve some bad news,” said Mum, as we got in from school.

Kate and I tutted as we dumped our bags on the door, both looking at her to get on with it.

We won’t be spending Christmas with Hugh and Marie this year, sorry.”

Oh no,” Kate and I said in unison, “Why?”

They’re going to Zimbabwe for Christmas,” Mum explained, “But the good news is that it’ll just be the three of us and we’ll have a great time, trust me,” she reassured us.

Yeah right,” said Kate, “Highly unlikely,” I added.

We had spent Christmas with our uncle, aunt and two cousins, Karl and Huw, for as long as we could remember.

It was our annual high-light of the year. As part of a one parent family, it felt good being around other people. And anyway, our house was crap compared to theirs and it was the only time of the year we got to live in the lap of luxury.

Anyway, the weeks turned into days and the days into hours and before we knew it, it was Christmas morning. Kate and I ran down the stairs, into the front room to open our presents.

What?”

We had to rub our eyes to make sure they weren’t deceiving us.

There were no Christmas presents under the tree, not one, it was empty and bare, devoid of Christmas cheer.

Where are the presents?” we said looking at each other.

Hey Mum, where’s the presents,” we yelled from where we stood at the top of our voices so she hear us from her upstairs bedroom.

Mum.......Mum.......Mum,” we yelled.

It took her a minute to wake up, put her dressing gown on and come down stairs.

From the sly grin on her face we knew she had something up her sleeve.

Where are the presents Mum?” we asked.

They are hidden around the house,” she answered.

What?”

It’s a Christmas game kids,” she said, “the presents are hidden around the house and you have to find them.”

Kate was about seven and I was three years older at ten. ‘Trust me, games are for kids’ and we just weren’t in the mood.

Oh mum, can’t you just give us our presents, please....”

Oh come on kids, it’ll be fun...” she assured us.

So the next five minutes saw us trudging around the house searching for our Christmas presents. Was it as much fun as Mum promised? ‘I don’t think so....’

I found one behind the curtains, Kate found one behind the sofa, I found another behind the door and Kate found yet another one behind the book shelve. So on and so on.

It didn’t matter what we got for Christmas, it was the fact we had to spend our time looking for them, which put us in a downer...

Oh come on Kids, cheer up, it’s Christmas day and this is meant to be fun,” Mum said.

Our glum faces said it all, ‘Whoopee Do.’

What a waste of time,” I said.

Thanks for nothing,” said Kate.

Better luck next time,” I said.

I wish we were at Marie’s and Hugh’s instead,” said Kate.

As we stood there with our hands on our hips, with the year’s Christmas presents unwrapped and unappreciated, standing there with sour looks on our faces, disapproving and loathing, Mum snapped.

I've tried my best to make this Christmas special and what do I get in return? Moan, moan, and moan. Well, fuck you kids. Make your own Christmas, spend it without me, see if I care,’ she shouted, flinging her arms up in despair.

She turned around and stormed out of the room and upstairs to her bedroom.

Slamming the door behind her, Kate and I looked at each other in shock and amazement.

We had often seen Mum angry, but nothing like this. This was new and unknown territory. “I mean, she actually told us to ‘Fuck-off’, and she’s never said that to us before.”

Our Christmas had suddenly turned into our worst ever Christmas. Our Christmas was ruined. We sat in doom and gloom, working out what had happened.

Two kids on the verge of crying, two kids all alone on Christmas Day.

Our minds raced. Could life get any worse? Is this what abused kids had to go through? Have we still got a Mum or not? Is Santa Claus really real?

But then our thoughts were interrupted with a ‘Ding dong.’

The doorbell took us by surprise.

We wondered who this could be, as I slowly opened the door.

Standing there was Mum dressed up as an old lady.

Bent forward, frail, supported by a snooker cue, dressed all in black with a scarf wrapped around her neck.

She wasn't wearing her glasses and squinted at us as she stood there smiling.

Hello children,” she said in a frail crooked voice, “I’m a friend of your mother’s, is she home?’ she asked.

Mum, what are you doing?”

Oh, no children, I’m not your mother. I’m a friend of your mother’s. Do let me in, it’s cold out here.”

Mum,” I yelled, “Don’t be so ridiculous.”

I ran upstairs to Mum’s bedroom, just to appease Mum at the door. The door was locked; and there was no answer.

Your mother isn't in? Well we can have a party without her,” said the Mum at the door, who we knew was our mother but somehow weren’t completely sure!

Once inside she made herself at home. We sat her down and offered her a drink. Mum always drank coffee and would spit it out, if she ever tasted even the hint of sugar. So, we made her tea with five sugars, of which she sipped happily and asked for another. Kate and I watched wide eyed in amazement as she did so.

Slowly but surely magic seeped into our day and we began to believe her. Perhaps this woman wasn’t our mother after-all....

As far as we were concerned our mother was upstairs locked in her room and, to be honest, we were having too much fun to care.

You must be hungry,” she said, to which Kate and I nodded, “Well go children, take what you want from the cupboard, pop the Bucks Fizz, and let’s get this party started.”

And that’s exactly what we did.

Kate and I raided the cupboard and brought out all the Christmas goodies which we weren’t allowed to touch until Christmas Day.

Games, music, laughter, chat and stories, presents, sweets and drink. By the time she got up to say goodbye, we were begging her to stay.

Oh I have to go children,” she said getting up and wrapping her scarf around herself.

Waving from the door, we watched her hobble up the street out of sight.

Amazed by what just had happened, I went upstairs to find Mum, but her bedroom was still locked.

Kate and I just collapsed onto the sofa, stuffed full and happy.

Sometime later Mum came downstairs, and we ran to her in laughter.

Get away from me,” she scolded us.

Hey come on Mum,” Kate and I answered, “Good joke Mum, you really got us,” we said.

What do you mean, and what is this mess? Who said you could do all this?”

But Mum,” we cried in innocence.

We told her everything that had happed, about the old lady who looked just like her, who came in and let us do what we wanted, how we tested her by giving her tea with five sugars and how we had the best fun in the world. But Mum just sat there, as if she knew nothing about it.

It was the best Christmas ever...


A tale from Taylor Tales, available now....

Wednesday, 7 December 2011

Letter to Prime Minister David Cameron about a very serious matter indeed


Dear Prime Minister,

While watching the television programme called One Step Beyond, on Edge Media TV, on Tuesday 6th December 2011, an Oxford economist and investigative journalist, called Martin Summers, made an amazing accusation concerning yourself.

According to his sources he claims that during the late 1980’s and early 90’s, South Africa sold ten uranium nuclear war-heads.

Allegedly six were sold to the US Government, and four were sold to the British Government, via Astra Holdings, a subsidiary company of Astra Fireworks.

Its claimed that Astra Holdings was funded by a number of senior Tory politicians, including Michael Heseltine and William Waldegrave, organised by Sir Kenneth Warren.

They are alleged to have brought the four war heads from Arms Corp of South Africa, on behalf of the British Government for £50 million.

Three people (Sir Kenneth Warren, Dr David Kelly and yourself Mr David Cameron), were alleged to have gone went to South Africa to finalise this deal; mediated by an Zimbabwean arms dealer called John Bredenkamp.

Allegedly the nuclear war-heads were transported to the country of Oman, where-upon Dr David Kelly went out to check on them, only to find they had been replaced with blocks of concrete.

This allegation implies British tax payers spent £50 million, which went into the pockets of the Astra Holdings shareholders pockets, of which £17.8 million was alleged to have been donated to the Tory party to fight the 1992 General Election.

Doug Hoyle, Labour MP asked in Parliament where the money came from, to which no satisfactory has ever been answer given.

It also raises serious implications in light of the Nuclear Explosions (Prohibition and Inspections) Act 1998, which states in Section 1-

(1)Any person who knowingly causes a nuclear weapon test explosion or any other nuclear explosion is guilty of an offence and liable on conviction on indictment to imprisonment for life.

Allegedly, one of the four war heads did go off in North Korea, during 2006, which resulted a 'fizzle explosion'.

As you can imagine this information is seriously worrying to hear and I am writing as a concerned voter and leader of the SOS Party (www.sosparty.co.uk), to ask you in the first person whether these allegations are true.

Is it true Prime Minister?

I look forward to your reply.


Yours Faithfully,
Matthew Taylor